The Faces Of Grief

(Each stanza representing a stage in the experience of grief.)

You left and I could never stop you
I cried for days and pinched me hurt
You were by my side one moment
And another, in a sirened rush.

I begged and fell, prayed to heavens
Like never before,
Threw myself to the ground in disbelief
And shrieked for you to appear again
I wished it was a nightmare like always
I wished it weren't true.
The cold tears differed.

I frowned, drowned and hurt myself
Hit me hard and widened eyes
Was it anger that you left me alone?
Or was it my helplessness?
I don't wish to know.

It should have been me,
It could have been me.
But does destiny ever obey?
I fell distraught and desolate,
The one to hold me up is gone.

My world stopped at a standstill
But time went on without a care
I kept silent as days struggled through,
Lost in the memories
Of bygone togetherness.

Months have passed
And you haven't spoken to me
Haven't caressed my hair like you did
You're really gone.
And everyone says I've dealt the best with
yourloss,
If only they knew the mask that I wear
And could feel the tears that flow beneath it.
If only you were here