Misfit Managed

Flashing teeth and tinkling cheers
Of dazzling smiles and clicking glasses
The red unwelcome to my misfit me
Whose eyes seek a rarer corner
Far and away from the fraught flood of funny folks
And so I pretend and put on a show
Of preoccupance and engagement

I receive calls from fictional phones
And numbers drawn out in my mind
And the talker talks without delay
Constraining me to those cut-out corners
I chose for my inability of indulgence.

I laugh and I then chat in seriousness
I listen, pretend to listen, and nod my head in agreement
For even in calls from nothingness,
I hesitate to disagree.
I introspect my little theatrical
And contemplate my next excuse,
For concocted calls too demand an end.

I then need to hustle in,
In and into flowing conversations.
Imploring the worth of my presence
And the difference of my absence,
Both answering out to none.
None, also my will of merriment
And my strength to pretend more
of all alright
As if i'm no misfit that walks among all
Playing parts of silly strangers,
Strange to even my misfit myself.